I think politics brings out the worst in people. I hate watching grown people behave like jackasses during election season.

For example, this headline caught my attention today:

Brown says he’ll pull attack ads if Whitman does; Whitman refuses

For realz?

Yes, Jerry Brown has said he’ll stop personal attacks, but only if Meg Whitman does. He won’t pull up his big boy pants unless Whitman pulls up hers.

Tit for tat. Quid pro quo.

So, what does good ole Meggie do? Meg sticks her tongue out and says, “Hell, no jackass!”

This is exemplary of why people hate politicians, and why most sane people would never run for office. It’s a joke and it’s embarrassing. And since when is the race for governor a game of chicken?

I’m watching similar sandbox wars go on in my own state. The Colorado gubernatorial race is extra saucy though because three major-party candidates are running to replace Governor Bill Ritter. Dan Maes is running on the republican ticket, current Denver Mayor John Hickenlooper stomps for the democrats, and Tom Tancredo is running on The American Constitution Party ticket.

Tancredo jumped on board late in the game, after calling for the republican primary candidates to drop out. Republicans were thought to be in position to take back the governor’s mansion but the roster of jokers were apparently dragging those chances down.  Maes won the nomination and refused to drop out. Enter Super Tancredo to save the day!

I just read that Tancredo and Maes met earlier this week. The Denver Post reports that the two sat on a park bench for an hour and a half. I wonder if anyone remembered to bring the bread. Especially if they met at Wash Park, ’cause the Canadian Geese are going to stop pooping all over the paths if we don’t make sure they are given food and a reason not to migrate south….

I imagine the conversation went a little like this:

Tancredo: Hey Dan, that goose looks hungry. Got any bread?

Maes: I really think it’s up to private business to feed their own geese.

Tancredo: Yeah, me too. I was just testing you.  Wait, this is a city park…

Maes: yeah whatever. So wassup?

Tancredo: Well, I was thinkin’ this whole governor race thing is fun and all, but aren’t you ready to give up yet? Our peeps are pissed and they say that Hickenlooper will win if we don’t do something. If you need a job I could probably hook you up with something. Maybe you want to be in charge of the Canadian Geese problem?

Maes: Nah. I mean, even if I drop out my posse will throw another body in the race.

Tancredo: Well, that’s cool. I’m game, let’s get another body in there.

Maes: Nah

Tancredo: Ok. What should we talk about now?

Maes: I don’t think it’s the government’s job to tell you what we should talk about.

Tancredo: uh. Yah, so – I gotta go. I have this thing….

Last month I attended the “Putting Kids First” gubernatorial forum, hosted by the Children’s Hospital, with its partners the Colorado Children’s Campaign, EPIC (Executives Partnering to Invest in Children), 9News (KUSA) and Mile High Mamas.  I found it very interesting but to say it was a snoozer is giving it too much life. (You can actually watch portions of it here) Hickenlooper came off very casual and nonchalant;  I’m not sure he even answered one of the questions posed to him. I could be wrong though, because the tangent train had my head spinning. Dan Maes not only answered the questions, he actually stayed afterward to talk to those of us attending a luncheon.  Tancredo dissed the forum all together for a fundraiser and Hick slipped out before anyone even got a chance to even see him.

I find myself completely turned off by the election process. The headlines are annoying and the people are smarmy.  I can’t wait until next Tuesday is over and the rug rolls up on this edition of Romper Room.

All ye ghosties and goblins listen up! It’s that time of year again! We’ll all be doing our best to get fat on 9lb bags of miniature candy bars.  I like to think of it as a pre-holiday warm-up for the coming months of excess. Our friends at SmartCo love to help us get our Spookly on, but they’d also like us to be safe this Halloween. Have you had a chance to visit any of the new SmartCo locations? I’ve become a big fan; on Wednesday I bought three of the most beautifully perfect pumpkins. I almost grabbed a bunch because they were only 2.98 EACH!

In response to my frequent tweet-happy shopping trips SmartCo asked if I’d like to partner with them to share some great safety tips and spread the Halloween spirit with a great giveaway valued at approximately $50!!  Of course, I said YOU BETCHA! Safety first, friends!

10 Tips for Keeping Children Safe this Halloween

1. Keep Your Home Safe – For your own home, candles in jack-o’-lanterns should be off the ground and out of reach. Try battery-operated LED candles for a safer option.
2. Keep Little Ones Close – Younger children should always go out trick-or-treating accompanied by a responsible adult and as early in the evening as possible. Consider also making sure each child has a buddy to hold hands with when crossing the street.
3. Plan for the Older Ones – For older kids who are responsible enough to go out in a group by themselves and who have cell phones, adults should plan a safe route in advance so they will know where their kids will be at all times. Older kids should also be given a set curfew, asked to check in with parents throughout the night and instructed to stay on well-lit streets.
4. Have the Stranger Talk – Instruct your child to never go into the home of a stranger or get into their car. Tell them what to do if a stranger should try to get them into their home or car – scream as loud as they can to draw attention and run away as fast as they can to a safe place.
5. Light is Right – Have each child carry or wear something lit such as: a flashlight, headlamp, glow bracelet or necklace, and/or fasten reflective tape to costumes and bags. Also, only trick or treat at houses that are well-lit.
6. Head out After a Meal – Serve your kids a filling meal before trick or treating and they won’t be as tempted to eat candy before they bring it home for you to check. You can even serve them hearty Halloween-themed snacks at home like mini pizzas decorated to look like mummies.
7. Comfortable Shoes are Key – You don’t want to be carrying shoes or your child, so make sure children are wearing well-fitting, comfortable shoes like sneakers. Light-up shoes add an extra bonus on a dark Halloween night.
8. Avoid Costumes that Drag on the Ground. While cute in theory, costumes that drag or have long tails can trip up little feet, get caught on bushes and be a nuisance.
9. Consider Avoiding Masks and Props – If a mask or prop must be used, let children try on masks in advance to make sure they allow full visibility and breathing. Feel free to cut larger openings to maximize comfort. Only carry flexible and soft props that can’t cause injury if a kid accidentally falls.
10. Dress Appropriately for the Weather – We all know that Halloween in Colorado could mean snow or 70 degrees and sunny, so plan costumes accordingly to make sure kids are comfortable. Always bring an extra layer of clothing just in case.

ENTER TO WIN!!

SmartCo will send one lucky reader all they’ll need to celebrate this Halloween!  Including:

• A trick-or-treat bag filled with candy

• Halloween party supplies

• Pumpkin carving tools

• $25 SmartCo Foods gift card

(all valued at approximately $50)

To Enter: Leave a comment telling me what your Halloween plans are.  Do you dress up? What will your kids dress as?

Bonus Entries (leave one comment for each):

1. Subscribe to Bantering Blonde

2. Follow @banteringblonde on twitter

3. Like SmarCo Foods on Facebook and tell them I sent you!

4. Tweet this: Shop in Colorado? I just entered Halloween Giveaway ($50 Value) from @SmartCofoods & @banteringblonde http://bit.ly/9J38iN

Winner will be chosen by Random.org at NOON Oct. 27th and will receive gift in time for Halloween!

It’s Blonde Social Media “Do Gooder” Day here at BanteringBlonde! I’m currently sitting in the New Media Room at the 2010 Blogworld Expo and the talk is all about #beatcancer and Blog Action Day 2010.

The Livestrong Foundation set a world record  last year with 209,771 unique mentions in 24 hours using the #BeatCancer tag.   From 12pm ET today (Friday) until 12 p.m. ET Saturday, Livestrong is encouraging folks to tweet, update Facebook status or write a blog post using the #beatcancer hashtag. For every mention PayPal and SWAGG will donate $0.05 to cancer charities. Visit beatcancereverywhere.com to donate directly to organizations like Stand Up To Cancer and Bright Pink.Stand Up To Cancer and Bright Pink.

Today is also Blog Action Day, an annual event that unites the world’s bloggers in posting about the same issue on the same day. The aim is to raise awareness and trigger a global discussion around an important issue that impacts the world.  This year’s cause focuses on clean water – a cause I am particularly passionate about. Clean water is essential for all life and there are too many areas of the world that do not have access to clean water. It is also one of the main priorities in the wake of a natural disaster. Participants in Blog Action Day can register their blogs and have them displayed on  Blogactionday.com. – it’s an interesting mix of international blogs, go take a look!

Here I sit in the most fabtastic airport, DIA, where the girls are pretty and the WiFi is free. I’m headed to Las Vegas for Blogworld Expo 2010 … Vegas Baby!  Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you look at it, my flight is delayed my flight by a few hours.  Like any responsible blonde mommy blogger, I headed to the nearest bar and am diligently writing….

Sadly, DIA is a Pepsi sphere and there isn’t a Diet Coke to be seen so I made my usual stop at the news shop the most important travel  necessities, skittles and water. I usually like to grab a magazine like Runner’s World but today I was stopped short as I perused the rack.  There, right in front of me, was the most beautiful picture of Rob Lowe! I snatched up the magazine and actually giggled when I realized that it was a copy of Architectural Digest. What? I’m not exactly a regular reader of this particular genre of magazine. I’d love to be someone who could dress a room and match colors but I was not blessed with a decorators sense of anything. In my experience, architecture is best left to the professionals.

As you know, I’m a total dork when it comes to digging deep for more information on anything that strikes me as curious or interesting. So, of course, I found out that this People & Places edition of Architectural Digest, will serve as the last under the direction of the magazine’s editor in chief since 1971, Paige Rense Noland. What a gift she has given her successor by transitioning with Rob Lowe! Out with a BANG!

I’m sure celebrities are not a rarity on the covers of this particular publication, but Rob Lowe spoke to me. Those eyes made me want to take an interest in my home. You know, gather some ideas, glean some inspirations? I’m almost 40, I’m aging, my children are old enough to wipe their own bottoms (although, Lord knows when they’ll be coordinated enough to hit the water and remember to flush) – the timing for this cover is perfect!

I picked up the magazine because I wanted to touch Rob Lowe but I’ll actually read it because the pictures are fantastic and it’s oddly interesting to read about the people that live in these sparkly clean dwellings. Suddenly I’m hypnotized by a fresh and vibrant home library and a couch that just screams “Come on in, put your feet up and read a good book.” Of course, a space that clean and quiet would be a dream but I prefer a little proof that life exists in my decor…. the only things missing from these photos are the granola bar wrapper on the floor, and a sciences book with yesterdays math homework crammed into, propped open by a lone sock……

I’m sure it was just an oversight. Perhaps it will be something for Ms. Paige’s successor to consider?

What’s your favorite room in your home? What makes it “speak” to you?

I was going to redesign my logo and not tell anyone just to see if they’d notice, but then I remembered, I don’t actually have a logo! So it’s no big deal, right? If I want to shiny up a bit and toss the old boring design for a new boring design it shouldn’t matter…. right?

Tell that to The Gap, they redesigned their non-logo this week and quietly slapped it up on the ole’ website. No announcement. Just a “slam, bam, thank you ma’am” and that was that. Well, until hordes of people began spitting on the new design, 2010 Social Media Style.

People started leaving hate messages on Gap’s Facebook page, tweeting insults, and blogging their angry little hearts out. The designers, marketers, customers, and clowns all have something to say.

Guess what? So do I!

The fact is, I think The Gap is just trying to identify with the younger “chic geek” generation. Did you ever think of that? Has it occurred to you that you are no longer in the demographic? You know, the trendy hip gal/dude category? That’s right, folks, gravity hasn’t been kind and The Gap designers are ready to dump you on your big blue box.

Here is what I imagine The Gap is trying to tell you small blue box haters….

Ok, now listen up you 70’s 80’s 90’s babies, you need to just shut the F*** up and head down to the corner store for another dose of your medical marijuana.

Oh, what’s that? You still think it sucks? Well, guess what? You suck, you freaky old person.

You might want to ask yourself why you are still shopping here. Seriously! You’ve lived through two rounds of skinny jeans, the t-shirts are too tight for your aging belly fat, and we just really can’t be bothered with all of the complaining about the pleats. Pleats are back and you are old and too fat, so of course you look like shiz in them! OLD. old. OLD.

You are OLD and you are not our target demographic anymore, so quit tweeting and Facebooking and all that other shizbit you freaky old people do.

Ah Ha! It all makes sense now, doesn’t it?

You’re welcome. Now go Make Your Own Crap Logo…